Wednesday, April 30, 2008
Tuesday, April 29, 2008
Your baby's brain is working overtime these days, developing faster than ever. Connections between individual nerve cells are growing at a frenetic clip, and your baby can now perceive information from all five senses. Sure, your baby can't smell anything right now, but that's only because he or she is still submerged in amniotic fluid and needs to be breathing air to get a whiff of anything. Lucky for you — and your baby — yours will be one of the very first scents your baby breathes in, a scent that will quickly become his or her very favorite.
So what's your little dove doing all day while you're busy feathering your nest for his or her arrival? Making faces, hiccupping, swallowing, breathing, pedaling with little hands and feet along your uterine wall, and even sucking his or her thumb. In fact, some babies suck their thumbs so vigorously while in the womb that they're born with a callus on their thumb (what a little sucker!).
Your uterus can now be felt four inches above your belly button, which means that it's pushing all the internal organs that used to be there somewhere else. That could explain why you're feeling a little spare on air lately, don't you think?
I have also found that the shortness of breath is very true for me this week. On Sunday Mini decided he wanted to beat the heck out of my right ribcage. Wow the pinching and hard to breath moment lasted about 15 minutes but all in all - it eased up. I was just glad to have read that tidbit before it happened. I would have thought the baby was trying to come out the wrong end.
I am told that less frequent movements start this week. I can definitely still tell there is something in there. The movements are not as strong as they were originally - but now, you can watch the bulge move around the stomach. So I know things are still going on. I just tend to get kicked less hard.
Sleeping is getting really uncomfortable - It is still pretty manageable but noticeably more difficult.
This week marks an incredible milestone in your baby's lung development. Before now, the air sacs and branches in your baby's lungs were present but not functional. The lungs were not able to inflate properly. However, now there is surfactant being produced in your baby's lungs. Surfactant prevents your baby's lungs from collapsing outside of the uterus and the baby is able to take in air and breathe properly. The fetal ear is almost completely developed both inside and out. Your baby can hear your voice and other familiar sounds that s/he will recognize after birth. Your baby is putting on white fat under the skin and the skin's color is pink instead of red at this point. Your baby's fingernails have grown to the end of her fingers and s/he may scratch herself while s/he is in the womb.
Ok onto the GD nutritional appointment: as promised a new mini:
I am now a proud owner of a 1 To.uch Ul.tra Mi.ni. The meeting with the nutritionist was fine. I found out that I should be eating about 2400 calories a day. I was not eating neither enough. We have mapped out what looks like a pretty good schedule (that I have to stick to- I am going to develop more o.cd tendencies) I also have to write down everything I eat. That is going to be the challenging part for me. I also found out that I failed the fasting results by 4 points and the 1 hour by 2 points, They were able to find my 4th draw and it was w/in the normal range. What I am hoping all this means is that by eating every ~2 hours I will be able to control my sugars pretty well. This mornings monitoring has gone well so far. keeping all fingers crossed and lot of good thoughts and vibes going to my sugars. The dietitian was impressed with what I was already doing and we just added about 1000 calories in my daily diet.
The nurse was surprised my sugars were as good as they were based on the pc.os, m.etfor.min and family history. She has high hopes that I can manage this with monitoring and more food. Let's hope. They gave me free range on peanut butter ... I can eat peanut butter on anything I want... Silver lining.
I go back to see them May 5th. I go and see my OB May 9th. Let's hope that I get good reads this week and ease into writing everything down.
I have 24% left to go. I can make this happen.
Friday, April 25, 2008
Thursday, April 24, 2008
I have to admit I am alil bummed out - but It's not the end of the world and I will do my very best to not let this bring my spirits down and make the best of the situation.
Here is more picture progress:
Tuesday, April 22, 2008
My lab for the urine was negative of a UTI- So i am all clear with that!
Now onto important stuff: I am 30 weeks today and,
74% of your pregnancy has passed, there is 26% left to go.
For several months, the umbilical cord has been the baby's lifeline to the mother. Nourishment is transferred from the mothers blood, through the placenta, and into the umbilical cord to the fetus. Their bone marrow is now responsible for red cell production. These red blood cells will continue to service your child's body by transporting oxygen and removing the wastes. Your baby begins storing iron, calcium and phosphorus. The fetus now weighs about 3 pounds (1.4kg). He or she will gain about half a pound a week until week 38. Baby is getting fatter and beginning to control its own body temperature. Baby continues to put on fat stores and the major weight gains will occur in the coming weeks. Eyebrows and eyelashes are fully developed, and hair on the head is getting thicker. Head and body are now proportioned like a newborn. Hands are now fully formed and fingernails are growing, eyelids are opening and closing.
Okay, now you’re starting to wonder if you will ever be NOT PREGNANT again. Over the next ten weeks, you may begin to feel anxious and tired. Those pregnancy hormones take over again, as they prepare your cervix for delivery. This may bring on some more mood swing and fatigue. The pregnancy blues is a common phenomenon in the third trimester. If you are feeling anxious or overwhelmed, talk to your doctor or midwife. If you just need to vent, try a friend that’s been there before. She will understand your concerns. If someone tries to tell you a labor and delivery horror story, politely decline listening to it.
I have totally fallen into the last paragraph - as you can tell from my panic attack posts over spilled milk. I am feeling more overwhelmed and tired. I do not think that I have even have thought about not being pregnant -or not even being pregnant again ..I am just concentrating on getting Mini here the safest way possible.
Work has either picked up- OR i am losing my ability to multi-task. I have one more month, then things will calm down. For me, It's like the hustle and bustle before Christmas. After yesterday's fantastic photo op and fantastic scan, I can not wait to meet my baby. He is really Real and in my belly ... ( oh and he has hair!!- wonder if it's that beautiful color like his dad's)
Monday, April 21, 2008
The dr say all things Mini are doing very well. He is weighing in at 3 lb 12 oz. (which is in the 60%) - just above average. Not bad at all! I told h I'm I failed my 1 hour gtt and had the 3 hr one tomorrow. He went and got my results faxed to him and said that he believes that based on those results I should pass the 3 hr with no problem. His suggestion (which was also my ob's) graze more. Eat lil snacks all day. We says even if for some fluke reason do not pass- we checked the baby and know that the baby is right where he would want to see the baby and that I am doing very well with my weight, bp and diet. My cervix was long and tight - and baby is head down (for now) - he said it is good to see - but could change. We won't worry about baby position until 37 ish weeks. They looked at the baby's spine today through the 3d machine and counted his vertebrates because I have a few fused and I was worried about that. From what they printed out and counted on the screen - Mini has all he should have and none look to be fused. YAh good news!
Tomorrow I am 30 weeks - and I will take my 3 hr gtt- and i will be completely zen and calm about it. What ever will be will be. You would have thought I remember that I have no control over some things - but I guess I need reminders every now and again. w/o further ado, Meet 3d Mini: (look at those CHEEKS!!!)
Saturday, April 19, 2008
Are you, a friend, or family member having difficulty conceiving?
Wondering what to do next and need answers? Do you know someone considering Adoption and isn't sure how to start the process?
The 4th annual "Paths 2 Parenthood" conference is a FREE event that includes break-out sessions with experts, breakfast and lunch, opportunities to meet reps who provide Family-building services,(including adoption agencies,infertility products and more), as well as the chance to win great prizes.
This years guest speaker is Dr. Alice Domar, a pioneer on women's health issues, nationally known speaker and selling author of, "Infertility Explained" and "Conquering Infertility". Dr. Domar has appeared on the Today show, Good Morning America, CBS this morning, Dateline NBC, CNN and has gone on tour with Oprah and the LLuminar team for health and wellness.
Come share in this unique opportunity to meet, hear and ask questions of nationally known professionals in the field of fertility and adoption, helping those hoping to build their family.
Sincerely, the Tampa RESOLVE team
Friday, April 18, 2008
P for pissed off -
I know that I am so self absorbed about my 3 hr gtt test- I hear myself saying things in my head like "OH My G-D get over yourself", "stop being such a whiny kid", "just take the damn test"
I keep repeating myself like a broken record : "I know this is ,by no means, the end of the world". I do also know that there are actual, real, terrible things going on right now. Things that are beyond comprehending. And I am sitting here wallowing in my own lil world, worrying about my self absorbed bruised lil arms. (insert eye roll) Yes, I am tired of myself!
I am just ultra pissed off- My Ob's office did work very hard to try and make the pic line happen. Right after I posted the blog about how I am so grateful they helped me out - I hit the publish button, called the number she gave me to schedule the appointment with. Found out I needed to call My OB coordinator back because there was a "miscommunication". Called my OB coordinator back, left a message for her to return my call ..... she never called me back- and at 2:45pm today I called her back - I debated not calling her back and just saying "a few four letter words here"- but against my better judgement or my concern for my baby, I called again - I am gluten for punishment. I received news that no one will(or wants to) do the pic line, So I just need to go get stuck by the lab 4 times on Tuesday morning. I mean what do they care- It's not their arm that hurts and bruises for weeks, nor are they the ones that have to stick me over and over.
The lesson here for me - One day I will learn not to fight the system. One day I will go with the flow. I just try to look out for me (and now my baby in utero) - but the world is not operated that way. We have set standard ways of doing everything- a one size fits most and if you aren't the "most"- suck it up. I should be used to not being that "most" in the one size fits most world ... You would think that I would have lowered my expectations by now ..Silly Me. I am just mad that I think PCOS is coming back to haunt me, even now. I thought I could stop thinking about insulin resistance for at last 9 months ... but Looks like that's a negative. I think the frustration comes from feelings of disappointment in my body resurfacing and having fear set in awfully too close to home again. I know that is is quite normal for many to fail the 1 hr and pass the 3 hour. I am afraid that My body is going to start failing me now- Now that we have come this far, and that is a scary place to let your mind go to.
Thank God it is Friday - I need the break. I was planning on working tomorrow to make up time for all my upcoming dr's/lab appointments Monday and Tuesday, but I think I just need a break.
I do apologize know for this ungrateful, fearful post .. It's just fear and it needs to get out of my head -- I am hoping that hitting post - Makes it less haunting and less controlling over me
Thursday, April 17, 2008
She worked for her $'s today and yesterday and found a lab (actually the L&D Lab Center of the hospital I will deliver at) who will administer a pick line( not sure if that is the correct medical term for it). They will flush it out with hep.arin before each draw (since we know I respond fine to hep.) I am instructed to get 150 grams of extra carbs a day for 3 days prior to the test. I will take the test Tuesday morning - so Monday night, I am instructed to stop eating/drinking at midnight. After I receive my first fasting blood specimen, I can have water.
They wanted me to take the test Monday, but I have my MFM appointment at 9 and it is very far away from the hospital in which I need to go to. So it has to be tuesday. On Monday- we get another growth scan. I cannot wait and still hope that there will be only good news from that.
This eases my mind some what. It is still filled with worry, anxiety, fear, disappointment, guilt etc. I limit my sugars as it is. (very rare do I enduldge on juices/sodas, candy, cookies, sweets, etc) I was worried this would happen since we already knew I am insulin resistant. I know in my heart, no matter what, I will be ok ..It's my mind that is off filling my head with bad things.
The nurse at the ob's on friday did not send in my urine for analysis - therefore the ob nurse asked today if I would repeat that urine sample to check for a UTI. I am going tomorrow morning to a lab to do that urine sample - she was so upset that I have to do it again. (and very apologetic) She is so sweet to me - I told her that it was easy to stop in a do a urine sample. She had done me a huge favor and made me feel much better abut the gtt test that I had absolutely no problem doing a urine sample over.
This is all no big deal- I know -pregnancy hormones make everything seem like the end of the world. There is just so much fear involved. I know that this too shall pass.. and so will I. Thank you for the kind words/comments/thoughts/prayers.
Wednesday, April 16, 2008
I failed the 1 hour gtt - my number was 167 - so They want me to do the 3 hr gtt. I explained to the nurse that I am a bad stick(read any previous post that invloved givig blood) - I currently have a huge bruise on both arms now as it is from tryig to squeeze alil blood out of me for the 1 hr test. There is no way that my body will allow me to give blood for the 3 hour test. It took 4 lab techs to get the are minimun out of my body for the 1 hour -- the 3 hour is going to be brutal on my veins and I'd prefer to not do it if there are other options..so i wait ..and hope there are other options. They cannot consider me gd w/o the 3 hour test and my insurance w/o cover any additional testings unless I do the 3 hour tests. Therefore I cannot have my metformin back. I asked if I could do my own blood sugar monitoring? I wait for answers ...
Also I am anemic and need to start taking 2 iron supplements a day -- She told me to take it w/ orange juice. I laughed and informed her that surely the OJ would up my sugars. She sighed and said Yes, don't take it with OJ, try and eat more iron enriched foods .....
This will all work out and I will stop being frustrated soon.. but right now - I am in the "i just wish a sista could catch a break" mode. This too shall pass.
We took my 29 week picture last night - I found that I wore the same shirt at 20 weeks .. here is the difference:
Tuesday, April 15, 2008
- Yes, It's that time again. p-word with a pretty cool video
- I am 29 weeks.
- We used my digital camera to record a poor quality video of Mini kicking up a storm 2 nights ago. I just love seeing and feeling that. I am told that I am going to miss those things. I may. Right now, it just all feels somewhat like a Sci-Fi movie. (stole the idea from kristen)I debated posting it, it sorta looks like I am not wearing any clothes - but i swear I am. Here it is, you've been warned:
- I still haven't heard back from my OB about the test results. I am still holding my breath in nervousness.
- I have been pretty headache free up until a few days ago. These heachaches are absolute killer
- Acne is back with avengence. I had to change face scrubs again.
- I am working on my I,pod play list to take to the hospital - any suggestions? Soothing music? What are your choices?
- What kind of sleep clothes are best to take to the hospital? Gown, button up, no buttons, pull on, top/ bottom set? ..Help
- It was a busy weekend doing nothing. Ever had one of those? Ran lots of errands and getting no where fast.
- I semi wanted to get the crib up but I was veto'd and told it would be done at a later date ... Whatever
- I notice I am good to go from about 9am-4pm. After that, I just crash.
- My husband reminded me how long "it's" been - poor guy. He just needs to hang in there. I know it has been rough on us but I am busy making sure all things continue to be great with as little anxiety as possible
- Someone asked about my dreams - they are bizarre and usually have absolutely no point what so ever. Some I remember, some I don't. Last nights dream was Me at a friends house, her grandmother (who was actually a character in a book i am reading) was terrified by my eyebrowns and began pluking them. WEIRD - I just reently had them done along with the horrible pedicure. My eyebrows look decent right now ...
- I need to post a picture, I think the bump is traveling - or moving south or relocating. I need your vote.
- There weren't any super fun facts about 29 weeks that I could find. It was all about stretch marks, vericose veins and other non-sexy stuff.
Sunday, April 13, 2008
I was alittle nervous about the possibility of taking antibiotics and having to do the 3 hour gtt. After talking it through with E - my nerves have been calmed a bit (for now). Thank you for those that sent emails/comment about your concern. I have to keep reminding myself that I feel confident in my dr's and their care.
I was watching (way too much) tv this weekend and learned that juli.anne ho.ugh from d.anc.ing with the st.ars (dwts) has a brand new record out??? There is a video I linked to. She isn't 1/2 bad, not at all what i expected.
I went here yesterday because I found out they will do bra fittings. Oh was I in denial. The size was large ... I was in shock ..Poor girls had been stuffed in a bra 3 times smaller then the size needed! Whoops? I bought 2 new bra's in the right size. They were about 1/2 off each bra and the sales clerk had a $10 coupon from their flyer she let me use. I highly recommend this if you are in need of new under garments. I didn't realize how much better your back, shoulders, chest feel in a new one that is just your size!
My husband (and father) decided against putting the crib together this weekend. They told me not to worry they'd get it done and w/in a timely manner. SO I am not worrying about it anymore. It's up to them. I still need to find 4 wooden frames to hang up those elephant pics I bought on et.sy.
I do hope everyone one survived the weekend and is ready to start a new week. Thank you for your continued support.
Friday, April 11, 2008
My ob's appointment today as wacky. I got there and once again, the dr i was supposed to see was not there and the office called the wrong number to tell me (they blamed the new computer system- which is fine - we corrected it) So we showed up anyway - and got seen by my very fav dr - so it was a win situation for me. I lost a lb from the last appointment but no one is really concerned. I had loads of sugar in my urine (but I told then that I would before I even pee'd in the cup from the gtt test) There was an excess of red blood cells in my urine. They asked if I was bleeding, had bled or spotted or was feeling any weird pressure. I told them that I was feeling some pressure but I assumed it was the baby just growing and sitting(read or using my bladder as a punching bag). I reminded them that this is my first pregnancy that has made it this far so I don't know what "weird pressure" feels like. They are sending my urine out to a lab to see if I have a uti or a bladder infection. Let's hope No to both!! Please and thank you.
I have another appoint with the OB in 3 weeks (may 5). I will be changing from lo.ve.nox to he.per.in at 34 weeks then I will go every 2 weeks after that appointment. Wow getting close.
I told my dr about the leap yr changing our due date - she laughed and said - "yah cuz babies know it's leap yr." We got a good laugh out of that! I hope everyone has a great weekend
Thursday, April 10, 2008
Did someone mention free ice cream? Come meet BABY BARGAINS author Alan Fields when he signs books at Great Beginnings “Green Day” in Gaithersburg, Maryland (just outside of DC) this Saturday April 12 from 10:30am to 1:30pm! Here's what's on tap:• FREE copies of the brand new 7th edition of BABY BARGAINS book will be given to the first 300 folks in the door.• FREE ice cream for the kiddos.• Raffle prizes—over $1000 in free stuff!• In store activities, information seminars and more.• Special advice on “green parenting,” co-sponsored by Whole Foods Market.When: Saturday April 12. Doors open at 10:30am. Book signing is 10:30am to 1:30pm.Where: Great Beginnings in Gaithersburg, MD. Address: 18501 North Frederick Avenue. 301.417.9702Why: Free ice cream. Need we say more?For directions to the store, click here.Come by and say hi!
The company is gone, I survived.
Tomorrow I have my 1 hour gtt test. I am nervous. I have PCOS - I am over weight. I was taken off my Met., I am hoping that I can pass this - if you can, please say a lil prayer. I also have the monthly OB appointment after the test. The test was supposed to be done a week ago - but owell, I forgot. I am hoping all is still going well.
I actually called a pediatrician today. I asked if they were accepting new patients. They said yes, Asked a few more questions about how do I go about picking them as Mini's ped. - Got Info and paperwork etc. It's as easy as telling the Hospital after delivery. Voila done. So that is checked off my list.
This weekend is a perfect weekend to start getting our spare room ready. I kind of had a tad of a freakout in the shower today thinking about having a crib in a room for a few more months sans baby .. I NEED to get over this ( i think). But I am not yet. I want to wait .... gosh my brain does some mean tricks to me.
If you don't already know, Kathy is my original due date buddy. About 13 weeks ago she found out some extremely awful news about her Baby Molly. She could use a prayer or two and support if you could spare.
Tuesday, April 8, 2008
Today I officially enter the 3rd trimester w/o any debate. (i may have entered it sooner - but today my dr's recognize it !!!!!!) Yes, really pinch me, I made it. This just seems like a Ginormous milestone for me mentally. I am just awe-struck and in total shock that I have made it this far. If you would have told me that I would be celebrating a 28 week- 3rd trimester mark in a pregnancy a yr ago - I would have twitched in fear that It would never happen! But, here I am, and I am beyond thrilled and at a loss of words. Still feeling More and Less confident every day - yes they contradict each other. I know What a difference a yr make.
According to here - I have 32% left of this pregnancy! 68% behind me.
Branches of lungs are quite developed now, so there is a good chance that baby would survive if born prematurely now. If your baby is born this week, the chances of survival is now at least 90 percent. However, some complications are still possible.
Your baby's eye lashes are developing, as subcutaneous fat is deposited. If you have a baby boy, his testes will probably begin descending. Your baby is about 13.8 inches long (35 cms) and weighs about 2 pounds 4 ounces (1 kilogram)!
As for my symptoms - Dreams are becoming much more frequent and bizarre by the sleeps. I am finding more pillows = better nights sleeps.
Kicks are often and loved!
I am having some swelling towards the end of the days when I am constantly on my feet. I should have already had my gtt test last friday and totally forgot about it. I will get it done this friday before my monthly ob appointment. That way I can say - Yes it's done ..opps it's late.
I am still hovering around 8lb-10lbs gain total weight gain. Some days I assume I retain more water then others? I am trying not to pack on the lbs and continue to eat as healthy as I can. I have found that I get lazy with my selections lately and choose easy not so good for you stuffs.
I am going to order that dress I mentioned a few posts ago! You guys all helped talk me into it! Thank you very much - I can't wait to have it. Maybe I will go to a craft store and try and find a satin blue ribbon and replace the hot pink ..or not
Things that come off my to-do list:
Pre-register with the hospital
schedule child birth class
Things on my to-do list:
put together a nursery
pick a pediatrician
start mentally preparing for a live birth - HOLY .. this really scares me
Discuss Maternity Leave with my work
I am sure there will be more and more added to this list as the days go on - but here I am right now - just enjoying, smiling and celebrating where I have been and where I am now and who I have met along the way. Each of you bless me an many ways! Thank you does not explain the gratitude my heart and soul feel for each of you.
Monday, April 7, 2008
Nesting – Here is an example of how my cleaning and brain works. I made dinner and I was trying to put the dinner away and put the chicken in the fridge for the next days’ dinner. I found old things that needed to be thrown out. Left over containers, half empty soda cans, etc. So at 9:30 I am in the kitchen pulling everything out of it to scrub it down “because it’s dirty”. Meanwhile, I have a house full of family. E walks in and asked wtf am I doing? He is laughing because he follows up with, hey crazy lady, nesting much … I had all our fridge contends all over the kitchen scrubbing the shelves… He reminds me that I was only supposed to be putting the food away and getting the chicken out of the freezer to go into the fridge … That I am supposed to be taking it easy….. So he helped me get all situated and back in the fridge and sent me to bed …. And told me not to touch anything else … go straight to bed …
Musings from my Mil so far
“Now you know why I did it so much” referring to pregnancy had having kids ….
No…no I do not know why, our situation is much much different
“I can’t believe that you haven’t gained a lot of weight, I gained so much weight at your age when I was pregnant”
That was because at my age, you were on kid #5
“When are you going to name this poor child, I can’t believe he doesn’t even have a name yet, poor baby is already being neglected”
“I only had 2 kids at home for Easter this year. It was the saddest Easter ever. What am I going to do next year?”
OMG, the youngest is 4, the next one is 10 – tend to them, take them to fun Easter egg hut places instead of moping”
"Now that you know you can have kids, you ready for more?" Blank stare
Giving much unwanted assvice on how to do my lo.ve.nox shot, disapproving where and how my Dr told us to do it. Insisting that I am going to either hurt the baby or tear the placenta …. Seriously an awful awful awful thing to say to me … I ready try to combat my anxieties, I do not need others filling my brain with negative thoughts.
So many more … The vacation isn’t over and all that was only in 3 hours. …
Sunday, April 6, 2008
My shower is May 17th and I am trying to have my registry complete before the invites go out. The more info I read, the more my decisions become clear as mud on what type/kind/things I need to register for. There are just sooo many choices. I don't think planning my wedding had this many choices. Plus I have run into a weird situation - I love to find stuff on the internet. I am finding that not all chains carry the same items - nor have access to ordering the things you may find on their website .... very frustrating. SO when I find something I like, I can't run out and see it. I have found the stores offer similar items but not exactly what I was looking for. Grrrrr
My car needed hand washing. I called my father yesterday to see if he would help me since E was working this weekend. Plus my father has insane OCD when it comes to making sure all things on/in cars are clean enough to eat off of. After my father is involved in cleaning - It will pass the white glove test. So we spent alteast 2 hours making sure it will sparkle and shine.
I came home just in time to greet E in the parking lot and come up with a plan for dinner. His mother and 3 of the younger kids are coming over today and I am supposed to have the house cleaned. So last night, I started getting our house company ready. I was so tired and sore from all the manual labor.
Around 3:30 I woke up in some serious weird upper stomach/chest pain/pinching/crampy feeling. I waddled off to the bathroom hoping that would help. It took alittle of the pressure off the pinching pain but didn't make it much more comfortable. I tried to go back to sleep and finally managed to get comfortable enough to dose off. E's alarm clock went off at 5 and woke me up. I got up to go back to the bathroom. I was feeling better but not completely. He was worried about me, but I assured him sleep would make it all better. I woke up a few hours later, went #2 and started to feel MUCH better. I think my bowels were/are getting pushed on. (or i assume that was the problem - it seems to been some of the solution) I won't lie, it's 12:30. I have company coming in less than 4 hours and I haven't gotten out of bed or done any of the to-do's for today that need to be done before company arrives. I am feeling alittle paranoid, but with each nudge, kick, movement from Mini - I am slowly getting my confidence level back up in order to go clean the kitchen, fold laundry and run to the grocery store to get food for our guests and have dinner ready when they get here. I am not really sure how long they are staying. 2-3 days ish
I keep telling Mini, that he needs to hang out in there a lil while longer and If he does so I promise to take good care of him while he is in there! Any good thoughts you can spare for me today would be greatly appreciated! Hope everyone else is having a great end to the weekend.
Friday, April 4, 2008
Here’s the game:
Go to Flickr-
Type your answer into the “search” box.
Pick an image from the first page.
Copy and paste answer into blog
My name is:
Relationship Status is:
My Favorite Color is:
My celebrity crush is:
My favorite princess is:
My Favorite adult beverage is:
My dream Vacation is:
When I grow up I want to be:
Wednesday, April 2, 2008
A few bloggers have written about preparing their fur babies for the arrival of a baby. I got to thinking about my cats.
I have a black cat (onyx) that is persnickety as all get out. She only loves me - but she only loves me when She decides to. She absolutely hates E. He has done nothing to her, but her hate is strong. She is smart and totally understands the English language. We have had her the longest.
I also have a grey tiger. (sterling) She is fun loving and sweet. She is a pretty lil thing. She loves us both. Only problem, She is so dumb and dopey.
So they were both in the room with us Friday night and we loaded up a few good videos from thattube site and turned up the laptop speakers. I figured they'd both freak out like they do when someone comes over. They run and hide for hours. Nope - Onyx turned her ears back and gave me the "annoyed kitty" look a few times. "Like Dude, the TV is too loud." Then she got pissed off and pranced out of the room. Sterling, on the other hand, was intrigued. She was sniffing the laptop looking back and forth and E and I. Then we got to a crying baby. Her motherly instincts kicked in or something. She wanted to save the laptop. She looked and looked for the crying baby and was in distress and was trying to tell us that there was something going on. She would look back and forth at us like "Fix it. Make it ok." She was patting the laptop and looking around the room.
I honestly assumed they would both pull the annoyed card and move on. But to see sterling get all interested, it was sweet and alarming. She still has her claws ... that may have to change. All in all a fun and entertaining exercise.
I was looking at pictures of progression last night and look what I found. These are 10 weeks apart.
Tuesday, April 1, 2008
I must admit starting a few days ago, I feel I look HUGE and uncomfortable.
After last growth scan w/ the MFM, I panicked. Hearing about leap year and moving my due date up 1 day sent me into a full fledged panic attack. I know that is only 24 hours. It's insignificant, but in my head it was a WHOLE different MONTH ..ya know June IS before July ..... I didn't say I was rational. It wasn't so much the actual due date day being moved up as much as it was a realization that things were coming and sooner than I had allowed my brain to think about. Up until that moment, I was still waiting for the "but" of the situation. Hearing the dr's words made me realize that this IS happening ... Really happening .... and I have not taken time to consider how little time we do have left. I was/am too busy enjoying the now and how far we have gotten verses possibly preparing for the finish line in this pregnancy with a start of a new life to care/provide for.
I have heard of pregnant women having this one defining moment in their pregnancy when they realize that their pregnancy is going to result in a baby and how things are going to be real in just a matter of time. I had that "moment" last week also after that appointment. Things just seemed very Real. Seeing/imagining actually delivering our child. Followed by overwhelming feelings of inadequecy and unpreparedness. It's hard to describe. It wasn't like my ususal fairytale daydreams, or the preconceived notions of the "When I am pregnant, I will do This", nor was it an "ah ha" enlightening moment, It was a "Oh $hit moment" ..It was a bit of reality check for me. Because I am pregnant. It's no longer a when like I fantisized about. and There is MUCH more reality that I had ever considered.
I have been pregnant longer than I have left to be pregnant. .. Think about that. It's spooky.
This thinking sent me in a tailspin. I started trying to have all plans "figured out". I wanted to nail down a shower date .. (yes me - the one that wasn't sure she wanted a shower) I wanted to have all our plans made so we could have a commitment free month of June. *because april and may are completely over stuffed months for us with family birthdays, graduations and other family obligations* I pointed out that, E only has 6 more non working weekends to help me get the nursery set up. Out of those 6 non working weekends, only 2 completely open weekends that can be dedicated to getting all the house/nursery stuff done in time for June 30th. Only 1 of those weekend are after my shower. (e works every other weekend) I thought I had plenty of time. Where did it all go?
Related to getting the nursery getting ready, I have googled changing table more times than I would like to admit. I knew that when I bought just a crib, I was giving up my original ideal "plan"to buy a whole bedroom suite. I figured I could find the additional pieces "later". Last week, I felt like there was no more time for saying things like "later". This weekend, we found a great dresser/changing table combo at a local baby furniture store. It will be at my house by the end of the day today. Now, I really need to start cleaning out that room. My MIL will be here this upcoming week and she will need to stay in there - so we have to make a plan to get that room livable by Sunday. Can you tell Time slipped up on me?
I feel like I have such a long way to go, yet I have come so far. It's a Push me, Pull you kind of feeling. Maybe it's due to my lack there of sleeping.
Our sleeping habits are about to change. I have noticed a bit of swelling towards the end of my very long days and I want to make every effort to lay one my left side. I am now starting to have a hard time staying on my left side on my side of the bed. E sleeps on his right side - which means with me on my left, we are facing eachother and it just creeps me out. I can't sleep like that. It feels like someone is staring at you while you try to sleep. So as of last night, I requested that we change sides. Plus his side is closer to the bathroom.
Speaking of the bathroom, I am waking up about 3 times a night, 11 ish, 2 ish and 4 ish. Sometimes not always 3 times but always 2 times: 2 and 4 seem to be very consistant wake up times.
Please please please know that NONE of this is complaining. These are all just things according to me. I am trying to take in as much of this journey as I can. I am taking it in for what it is worth and documenting my experiences with this pregnancy after IF/losses. It may be helpful - it may not but I do not intend for it to be harmful.