I had an interesting weekend. Saturday, we went to our childbirth education class. I signed up for the medical assisted general birth class. There is a natural childbirth class but I figured I would go to the one on all the medical procedures first – and then if need be, go to the natural childbirth class. I know there is plenty of knowledge and resources available for natural childbirths. The class was being taught at the hospital I am giving birth at, so I was interested in hear their medical procedures on how a birth with medicine goes at their hospital. While much to my shock, the instructor, in my opinion, had her own personal agenda. Her viewpoints were not at all close to mine, which I am fine with, but has a instructor, I appreciate non-biases factual information. This was her second time leading the childbirth classes in over 15yrs. She normally teaches other classes that I feel she is way more suited for. I bet if I signed up for the other class she teaches, I would find her knowledgeable and quite helpful. But this class was about learning about childbirth and the drugs that are available. She spent a great deal of time teaching us labor positions and signs. She gave us a handout and we were to simulate labor pains (complete with moans and groans) and practice different positions with our birthing partners. I am, was not, never will be COMFORTABLE with any of that in a group setting. (16 couples, 2 women w/o partners and the instructor). These positions were just very touchy, personal and overwhelming for me to even try to do with so many people around. I have this major insecurity, inferiority complex in a group of people I do not know. Plus, I am not a touchy kind of person in public. Never mind to say that these “positions” could double as Kama Sutra positions. (This went on for 40 mins) So I did start to tear up and have a minor panic attack. Thank Gaawd for my wonder husband, who knows these looks on my face w/o me even having to speak. He whispers something very funny in my ear and calms me down a bit and we carry on through the remainder of the class. The last 40 mins she shows a film about the drugs and procedures (in an extremely negative connotation), and the saddest c-section story ever. *the reason the couple had to have a c-section is because the drugs slowed down her labor and “this was a result of choosing to use drugs vs. just toughening it out.” Everyone was in tears after that. She sent us home after the c-section video with her email address if we needed her. I threw her email address in the trash. I have no more questions for her. But now I am filled with lots of doubt and concerns. In the first statement about the class, she wanted to fill us with confidence. I feel as though the exact opposite happened for me. I think I am going to try and find more resources that may be useful for me – or ask my drs’ lots of questions at my next appointment. I have an OB tour of the labor and delivery wing Wednesday at 7pm. I may get more clarification then. Who knows. One thing I do know is that birth in some capacity is the inevitable and we will make it and go with the flow as much as possible. I now for sure know that only E and the staff will be in the delivery room. We talked about it, and I need to feel comfortable more than anything. That is E’s job to make sure on the day/night that it happens.
Thank you for those that wished me a Happy Mother’s to Be day. It was spent celebrating my mother. We took her out to breakfast and just sat around the table talking. Then ran some errands. I read this story on another blog and wanted to share it.
11 comments:
I'm sorry the birth class did not go as well as you had hoped. But I'm glad you made it through with some help from the hubs. It's a shame you didn't get more info but you can always pick up a good book or just depend on your instincts when you're in the moment.
I hope you had a wonderful Mother's Day! XOXO
I am so sorry that this class was not everything you hoped it would be. Although it sounds like everybody else was in tears also so atleast you weren't the only one. I hope you had a nice mother's to be Day.
Sorry about the class :( Hope you try another one or find a way that works for you so that you are ready!
Husbands can be so wonderful can't they? I am glad he was able to make it bearable for you.
What an awful teacher! She's wrong, don't listen to her! Any chance you can take the class again with a better teacher? I would call the hospital and complain. (Actually, I would make my husband call, he does all the mean stuff in our household.) It really doesn't sound like she fulfilled the point of the class at all!
Oh my Gosh! How unprofessional!!! Maybe you should say something about this woman? After all, there are just as many stories of birth going BETTER after meds. One of my friends was in labor for 20 hrs. She got her epi and things started to go much faster after that. The doctor said that can often happen.
It's definitely a very personal decision, and she should not have an agenda going in there.
YAY for the hubs though! And cool story.
When I asked my OB about childbirth classes, he told me not to waste my money...that nothing really prepares you. I would have to agree with that. Don't let this woman get you upset. You'll know what to do when the time comes. Women gave birth for thousands (millions?) of years with nothing but their instincts.
Wow, that sucks. So sorry the class was so bad. The whole point of those classes is supposed to be to make you feel MORE comfortable with the process. Maybe the same class is offered by a different instructor? And yes, I would absolutely call the hospital an complain about the instructor!
really long post-sorry! when we were pregnant with our first we signed up for every class we could find. First, we wanted to know as much as possible so, no matter what happened, we would have at least some knowledge of the situation. Second, to be around and meet other couples going through the same thing we were. I found the classes to be at least informative but, definitely agree with you in regards to your experience with the instructor. In NYC it seems there is a big push (no pun intended!) for "natural" childbirth. Like WAY natural. No drugs, water births, home births, Doulas, Midwives, and those are just the basic stuff. We opted for none of the above. But, we were always made to feel that there was something wrong with us for not going that way. The instructors just have their own opinions and expect everyone else to follow. Not fair and not supportive to make an already hormonal woman feel bullied at a time when she needs to be felt like everything will be ok, no matter what happens. Don't think too much about that class. If you're still feeling like you want to learn more about what you're in for, definitely take some other classes or, like another poster recommended, get some good books. If it's any consolation, I found that even after all the classes with instructors we did not like only talking about the most natural approach, on the day, we were in the hospital, with an epidural, induced and ended up with a c-section. And our nurses were great.
Wow, this lady sounds like a loony! Sorry the class didn't go as you expected. I don't think I would be comfortable "simluating labor" in front of a group of people either.
so sorry about the class. We are going to one starting this week and I am nervous about it. I will let you know how it goes.
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